By Eliza King
1. Why did the student eat his homework?
Because the teacher told him it was a piece of cake!
2. What is brown, hairy and wears sunglasses? A coconut on vacation.
3. Why did the kid cross the playground?
To get to the other slide.
4. How does a vampire start a letter? Tomb it may concern...
5. What do you call a droid that takes the long way around? R2 detour.
6. Why was 6 afraid of 7?
Because 7, 8, 9
7. What kind of tree fits in your hand?
A palm tree!
8. How much does it cost a pirate to get his ears pierced?
About a buck an ear.
9. How much does it cost a pirate to get his ears pierced?
About a buck an ear.
10. What animal is always at a baseball game?
A bat.
11. What falls in winter but never gets hurt?
Snow!
12. What building in New York has the most stories? The public library!
13. How do we know that the ocean is friendly? It waves!
14. What is a tornado’s favourite game to play?
Twister!
15. How does a scientist freshen her breath?
With experi-mints!
16. What did the banana say to the dog? Nothing. Bananas can’t talk.
17. How do you make an octopus laugh?
With ten-tickles!
18. Why did the dinosaur cross the road?
Because the chicken wasn’t born yet.
19. What do you call a boomerang that won’t come back? A stick.
20. How do you fix a cracked pumpkin?
With a pumpkin patch.
21. What do you call a fake noodle?
An impasta.
22. What did one toilet say to the other?
You look flushed.
23. What did zero say to eight?
Nice belt!
24. What do you call an old snowman?
Water.
25. Why did the tomato blush?
It saw the salad dressing.
26. What do you call a sleeping bull?
A bulldozer!
27. Why was the broom running late?
It over-swept.
28. Why do birds fly?
It's faster than walking.
29. What did the traffic light say to the truck?
Don't look, I'm changing.
30. Why did the giraffes get bad grades?
She had her head in the clouds.