Unanswerable Questions

By Eliza King and Molly Hanly


Why are there interstate highways in Hawaii?

If nothing ever sticks to TEFLON, how do they make TEFLON stick to the pan?

Why is the word " abbreviated" such a long word?

Why is it that rain drops and snow falls?

Why is a man who invests all your money called a broker?

Why is Lemon Juice made with artificial flavour and dish washing liquid made with real lemons?

Why isn't there a mouse flavoured cat food?

How do they get a deer to cross at that yellow road sign?

If a book about failures doesn't sell, is it a success?

If a turtle doesn't have a shell, is he homeless or naked?

How come we choose from just two people to run for president and 50 for Miss America?

Why is a person who plays the piano called a pianist but a person who drives a race car is not called a racist?

Do fish ever get thirsty?

Can you cry under water?

Why don’t birds fall off trees when they sleep?

Why is it called a ‘building’ if its already built?

When they say dog food is new and improved, who tasted it?

If money doesn’t grow on trees, why do banks have branches?

Why does a round pizza come in a square box?

Why doesn’t glue stick to its bottle?

After they make Styrofoam, what do they ship it in?

How can you tell when sour cream goes bad?

How much sin can I get away with and still go to heaven?

How young can you die of old age?

If you try to fail, and succeed, which have you done?

If man evolved from monkeys and apes, why are there still monkeys and apes?

Isn't it a bit unnerving that doctors call what they do "practice?"

Why doesn't Tarzan have a beard?

Do we make bombs better or worse?

How do Keep Off The Grass signs get there?

If swimming's such good exercise, how come whales are so fat?

If a person told you they were a pathological liar, would you believe them?

Can you learn to read from a "Reading for Dummies" book?

Why is the time of day with the slowest traffic called rush hour?

Why are they called apartments when they are all stuck together?

If a store is open 24 hours, why are there locks on the doors?

Who was the first to see a cow and think "I wonder what will happen if i squeeze these dangly things and drink whatever comes out?"

If you make a cow laugh, will milk come out its nose?

If one synchronized swimmer drowns, do they all have to drown?

If buttered bread always lands on the butter-side down and a cat always lands on its feet, what happens if you strap buttered bread to a cat's back?

If the "black box" flight recorder is never damaged during a plane crash, why isn't the whole airplane made out of that stuff?

Whose cruel idea was it for the word "Lisp" to have an "S" in it?

Why are there flotation devices under plane seats instead of parachutes?

Why do we drive on parkways and park on driveways?

Why is it that when you transport something by car, it's called a shipment, but when you transport something by ship, it's called cargo?

How come people tell you not to stand in front of an emergency exit when if there was an emergency surely you would run through it?

Why did Sally sell seashells on the seashore when you can just pick them up anyway?

Why are both of SpongeBob’s parents’ round like sea sponges while he is square like a kitchen sponge?

Why is it that if someone yells “duck” they are helping you, but if they yell “chicken” they are insulting you?

If nobody buys a ticket to a movie do, they still show it?

Why do we sing “Rock a bye baby” to lull our little ones to sleep when the song is about putting your baby in a tree and letting the wind crash the cradle to the ground?

If the Wicked Witch of the West melts in the water… how did she ever bathe?

Why isn’t the caps lock capitalized?

When the French swear, do they say pardon my English?

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